I Know What They Think
by Leia
Summary: [Complete] 'I know what they think of me. They think I'm dumb, and maybe I am, but I'm not stupid. There's a difference.' Reflective P.O.V. by Maron, Kuririn's exgirlfriend. Don't skip just because you hate her you just might learn something new.


Disclaimer: I ... *sob* ... own ... nothing ... *hiccup* ... Okay, that was dumb.  ^_^

A/N: I can't believe I'm doing this ... I'm gonna' get my hide flamed out from under me, aren't I? Anyhow, this is a short fic detailing Maron's thoughts. No, I do not like her. In fact, for the longest time, I couldn't stand her for how hurt she made Kuririn -- but think of it this way; while he was with her, he was ecstatic. And since I don't see Kuririn as falling for the first pretty girl he sees, Maron had to have some good points besides looks, right? *looks around at angry readers* R..right? 

Anyway. The inspiration for this story came because I decided, since I've currently posted 20 stories about characters I like, why not try writing something about the ones I don't? And not character-bashing, either . . . no matter how much I may dislike a character, I'm always able to find something good about him/her. So, I decided to write about the one character who has had so much hatred directed toward her (and rightly so? Who knows!) 

This is basically a plea just to read it with maturity -- don't scroll right down to the 'review' box and flame it without reading it just because I have the audacity to write a story sympathetic to Maron. I have tried to keep her in character, but I've gone deeper than what the anime shows. Well, enough babbling. Just read it -- and give me constructive reviews, please! Heavens knows I've seen enough fics about Maron being killed, I don't need to read it in my own review box after I've tried to do something nice to her. 'Kay?   
  


I Know What They Think

I know what they think of me.  

They think I'm dumb, and maybe I am, but I'm not _stupid_.  There's a difference.  I might not be smart like that adorable little Gohan kid is, but when a couple of jealous ladies sit there and talk about me when I'm _right in the room_, I can hear them.  And I know they're talking about me.

It's hard, being beautiful.  I know that sounds shallow, but it's true.  I don't care what people say.  Just because my hair does whatever I want it to, and I can wear tight clothes and look good in them, people assume I just stepped off a street corner.  Guys always like me -- goodness, they fall all over themselves to get me just to look at them -- but they just do it because they think I'm easy.  Oh, yes, I know they say that.  It can be an advantage, because boys seem to like that, but it can get discouraging to think that boys only look my way because they think I'll sleep with them after one drink.

I may flirt, but I don't sleep with them.  Believe what you want, but I'm telling the truth.

Kuririn-chan was the first person to see past that.  My Kuririn-chan . . . he's such a sweetheart -- always was, and probably always will be.  He was such a little cutie, with that shiny bald head of his, and his little baby face that just made me want to kiss him.  He was short, too, and that made him all the more adorable.  Most of the guys I've dated were tall, dark, and handsome (_ohh_, so handsome!), but Kuririn-chan . . . he was different.  I'm not saying he isn't good looking, because he is, but he's the kind of guy most girls giggle at but don't look at twice.

There was something about Kuririn-chan, though.  I met him at a shopping mall, when I was out with . . . uh . . . what was his name?  Tony, I think, or Marc . . . or maybe it was Kevin.  I don't know.  One of them, anyway.  I'm not sure what he was shopping for, but he ended up bumping into me and made me drop my  packages.  He got all embarrassed and picked them up for me, and he must have said sorry about fifty times.  It was so cute!  I think he was scared, because he kept looking at me like I was going to slap him or something.

He was the first boy who didn't give me that _look_ -- you know, the one that means he's going to say a stupid pickup line.  Pickup lines are okay, but I think I've heard them all by now.  Kuririn-chan just stared at me like I was some sort of fairy tale princess, and it made me feel special.  Not like those other boys, who seem to think I'm something they can buy.  (Not that I _mind_ when they buy me expensive presents or anything . . .)  Kuririn-chan treated me like I was a goddess, and that made him different right there.

I told him, that first day, that he could buy me lunch if he really wanted to make it up to me, and I didn't ever think somebody's face could go that red.  I still haven't met a boy who can blush like Kuririn-chan could . . . it makes me cry sometimes.  Oh, there I go . . . darn it, I'll get my makeup messed up, and it took me two hours to get it right this morning.

Anyway, Kuririn-chan and I ate lunch at a little restaurant.  I don't remember what happened to Greg or Arthur or whoever-he-was, and I never saw him again.  I'd only met him that morning anyway.  Kuririn-chan was so cute, in the way he ate; he kept sneaking little glances at me, like he was afraid I would disappear.  It was then that I knew he was special.

He blushed even more when I asked him his name, and it took him three tries to get it right, but I just giggled.  It made him seem even more sweet.  I told him my name, and asked him if he wanted to hang around with me for a while.  The poor little guy, you'd think I'd just told him he won a ten-million-zenni lottery or something, the way his eyes lit up.  I could tell he'd never had a girlfriend before, and that made me kind of sad for him.  He was so cute, and it was obvious he was really nice, so it surprised me when I figured it out.

  


That was how it started.  We met for supper a few times after that, and he told me about his job as a Z-warrior.  I still don't really understand all the bad guys and stuff, 'cause it was kind of confusing, with everybody dying and then being alive and stuff, but I listened.  Kuririn-chan's face lit up in such an adorable way when he talked about his battles, and I liked listening to him talk, even if I didn't get it.  He didn't care if I got it or not; I think he was too excited that a pretty girl was actually talking to him.

It was about a week after that when he asked me if I wanted to move in with him.  I was really surprised, because I'd never stayed with a boy for more than a few days, but like I said, Kuririn-chan was different.  I was excited when he asked me to move in, especially because I knew he didn't ask me just to have . . . you know.  He was too scared to do that, anyway, and I wasn't going to force him.  Sheesh, I'm not that silly.

I didn't really like the old man he lived with, because even though it was flattering how he stared at me, well . . . he's _old_.  He could be my grandfather!  Hmm, maybe he _is_ my grandfather, I don't know.  I'll have to ask him someday.  I didn't like the pig, either.  Boys pinching me is one thing, but something whose brother I might've eaten for breakfast this morning?  _Eww_!! That's just weird.  I'm not _that_ gross, honestly!  I liked Umigame, the turtle, though, even though he was paranoid.  I still giggle when I think about him freaking out when I tried to give him that kiss.

Kuririn-chan was so sweet, when I lived there.  He slept on the couch the whole time and let me have his room, but we had to share the closet.  I got most of it, though, 'cause we went shopping almost every single day and got me new clothes.  I don't like wearing things more than twice.  Kuririn-chan was so nice, buying me all that stuff and carrying the boxes for me, even though I told him he didn't have to.  Whenever I did that, he'd just turn red again and say that he liked it, and I'd just laugh and kiss him.  He used to turn _sooo_ red if I kissed him.  Boy, was that funny!

Speaking of kissing, it was always me kissing him.  I don't think _he_ kissed _me_ even once.  He was _way_ too afraid . . . he wouldn't even hold my hand unless I told him to.  It was kinda' cute, but sometimes it made me a little annoyed.  I'm not used to making all the moves like that.  But I ignored it for the most part, because Kuririn-chan was the first "nice" guy I'd ever dated, and I didn't want it to stop just because he was a little chicken.  Okay, a _lot_ chicken.  Whatever.

And embarrassed, too.  I can't believe I almost forgot that.  I remember when Kuririn-chan's friend Bulma (her boyfriend . . . Wow!  That Yamucha was a _hottie_!  Whoo!) asked if we were dating, Kuririn-chan turned bright red again and started stammering really bad.  He said something like "Well, she's not really my _girl_friend, we're just friends, we're not officially _dating_ . . ." and stuff like that.  That made me mad.  We'd been 'officially dating' for almost three weeks, me living with him for two, and here he was denying it?  Well, I'd show him!

I said that if we weren't dating, then he wouldn't mind if I went out with other guys.  I started flirting with Yamucha (that was fun . . . even if it hurt Kuririn-chan's feelings, it was kind of worth it.  Yamucha really is cute!), even though he pretended to ignore me.  His girlfriend was standing there pulling on his ear and yelling, so I guess he decided it wasn't worth getting killed.  Too bad.  It would've been a few fun dates, if Bulma had loosened up a little.

Anyhow.

Kuririn-chan looked like he was going to cry, and Bulma and that ChiChi woman (scary!  Sca-a-ary!  I feel sorry for her husband!) glared at me as if I'd just stabbed him through the heart.  I didn't mean to make Kuririn-chan feel so bad, because he's the nicest guy in the world and he's so cute . . . but he looks cute when he's sad, too.  Like a little lost puppy, and I wanted to hug him like a teddy bear right then, but he would've gotten upset, so I didn't.

We got that straightened out, and later everyone left.  I felt really sorry for Kuririn-chan then, and I felt bad that I had made him feel so sad, because he just sat there on the porch with Umigame for a long time.  I don't know if he was crying or not, but I wouldn't be surprised if he was.  I wanted to go out there and talk to him, but I didn't know what to say.  Most guys didn't care if I flirted when I was going out with them, but Kuririn-chan is really sensitive, and I think he felt like I'd punched him.

I waited until he came back inside, and then I said I was sorry.  I've never said sorry for flirting with another boy -- not _ever_!  I think Kuririn-chan knew that, because his face got that super-happy, 'I love you' look and he gave me a big hug.  He kinda' reminds me of little Gohan when he gets that happy face on, and it made me feel like I never, ever wanted to hurt him again.

  


We sat on the couch for a while, and he told me that he didn't think he was good enough for me.  I don't remember what it was he said, exactly, but it was because I was too busy looking at his face.  His black, puppy-dog eyes were wet and the tears were pouring down his face like he'd sprung a leak somewhere inside him.  I do remember him saying that he didn't blame me for flirting with other guys, that Yamucha was better-looking that he was, and probably knew how to treat a girl a lot better than he did.  Stuff like that.  It was really, really sad.

I told him he was being silly, and that if he ever said anything like that again, I would have to kiss him until he believed me.  He laughed, but it sounded like he was trying to convince himself and it wasn't working too well.  So, I held his hand and asked him to stay with me that night.

No, not like that.  Stop thinking that way.  I already told you, I'm not like that.  But even Kuririn-chan thought that's what I meant, and the look he gave me made me feel like . . . well, awful.  I frowned and said I just meant sleep, as in _sleep_ with me -- not "sleep with me".  He looked really relieved, and smiled, and followed me upstairs.  It was so weird . . . it was the first time I'd ever been in the same bad with a guy, and we didn't do anything.  Kuririn-chan held onto me like I was his teddy bear and he couldn't sleep without me.  It was so sweet, it almost made me cry.  He stayed with me every night after that.

You know, I still stay awake almost all night without Kuririn-chan sleeping next to me anymore.  It's like I got used to it over those couple of days, having him lying there beside me, snoring really quietly, almost as though he didn't want to keep me awake.  He used to sleep with one arm around my waist, but holding me gently.  He never tried to make me feel like he owned me -- he always made it clear that I could leave if I wanted to.

That, I think, was the start of the problem.  Kuririn was too . . . too . . . too _nice_.  I already said, I'm not used to nice guys.  It was what first made me like Kuririn, but after a while, it kind of weirded me out.  For one thing, Kuririn was so "nice" that he didn't ever want to make the first move.  Not in kissing, holding hands . . . nothing.  I'm not saying I wanted to go jump in the sack with him, but things were moving a little too slow for me.  I told him that, and he gave me that sad look again and didn't say anything for a while.  Finally, he said he was sorry that he couldn't give me what I wanted, and he went to bed.

On the couch.

A little while later, there was that big fight with that little guy . . . Onion, or Turnip, or someth - Garlic, I think.  Yeah, Garlic Jr.  I don't really know what happened, because as soon as things got bad, Kuririn-chan flew me up to that tower with the old cat and that really weird Samurai guy.  I stayed there for a day, I think, and then Kuririn-chan brought me back to his house.

That was the night ChiChi asked Kuririn-chan if we were going to get engaged.  I wanted him to say yes -- wanted him to say yes so badly that it scared me.  It still scares me; see, look -- I've got goosebumps all up my arms.  But Kuririn-chan didn't say anything.  He just got real embarrassed and almost scared, like if he said he was thinking about it, I would get mad and never want to talk to him again.  Boy, if that's what he thought, he didn't know me very well.

Something happened that night.  Kuririn-chan had a talk with Umigame again, and then he and Gohan went some place and didn't come back until early the next morning.  Maybe nobody will believe me, but I was worried.  I knew Kuririn-chan was strong, but that didn't mean something couldn't happen to him, right?  I mean, he'd already died twice!  I stayed awake the whole night, looking at his side of the bed and wishing he was there.  When he was gone -- when I was worrying like that -- I didn't care if Kuririn-chan was "too nice" anymore.  I just wanted him back.  I wish I knew what happened.

He came back, all right, but I knew something was different.  He just got into bed without saying hello or how are you or you look beautiful, Maron, or anything like that.  I asked where he'd been, and he told me he'd gone to do something, and he'd finally figured stuff out.  We both went to sleep after that -- or at least, Kuririn-chan did.  I couldn't sleep, because he'd been acting so funny.  So . . . quiet.  And the way he held me that night was different, too -- tighter, with both arms around me and his head on my shoulder.  It scared me.  It was like he knew something was going to happen, and he wanted to be with me one last time.

  


I've had lots of boyfriends.  I know when they're thinking that kind of stuff.  And I'm never wrong.

The next morning, Kuririn-chan took me out on a walk on the beach.  We were in our swimsuits, but I knew we weren't going to go swimming.  Kuririn-chan was walking funny . . . his shoulders were hunched and his head was bent so far down that his chin dug into his chest, and he kicked at the sand every time he took a step.  Finally, he stopped, and he turned around so I could see his face -- I can still remember the look he gave me, like he had to do something really hard and he didn't want to, but he knew he had to.

He told me that he wasn't right for me, and that it wasn't fair for him to keep me back.  He said he was letting me go.  Like I was a bird, or some kind of wild animal that he'd kept in a cage.  And me?  I just smiled at him and started to walk away, but before I left, I stopped.  I looked at him, and said, "I would have said yes," real quiet.  And then . . . I walked away.

I kept walking, and the whole time I wanted to run back, but I didn't.  Actually, I was waiting for Kuririn-chan to call after me, to yell my name and come running.  But he didn't, so I figured that I was wrong, that he didn't want to marry me.  I didn't think that maybe he hadn't understood me and that was why he just stood there.

I got to the street, and there was a cute guy in a really expensive car.  He grinned and invited me in, and it took me a second before I did.  I really did love Kuririn-chan, and I really did want to marry him -- but if he didn't want to marry me, then fine.  I wanted to forget him, and fast -- so I got in the car and drove away.

Kuririn-chan and I didn't see each other again.  I went back for him once, after breaking up with Jerry -- or was it George?  No, wait, it could have been Harold . . . or all of them, maybe.  Anyhow, the point was, I'd tried to forget Kuririn-chan by going back to the kind of men I'd dated before, but it didn't feel right.  As much as it used to make me uncomfortable, I actually missed dating a "nice" guy.  It's so weird that it has to be too late before you figure out how stupid you were.  So I went back, and I waited.

And waited.  And waited.  I don't know how long I was there, but my Kuririn-chan didn't come back.  He was off fighting again, like he did so much, and it was then that I realized I couldn't keep with that.  A relationship with Kuririn-chan was slow enough without him going off into battle for weeks on end.  So, I did the only thing a girl in my position would do -- I got on the phone and called all my potential boyfriends, and I left.  

Now don't get me wrong -- I still loved Kuririn-chan when I did that, and it's _because _I loved Kuririn-chan that I left the way I did.  If I hadn't gone away like that, with all those guys, Kuririn-chan's friends would have told him I'd been there, and that would have made him sad.  But the way I left, I knew they would never tell him, because it would hurt too much.

It's been a long time.  Years -- too many years.  There was another big fight with some bad guy, about two years ago, and I'm sure Kuririn-chan was in it.  I've had tons of boyfriends, but none of them were special like him.  I tell all of them that I love them, of course, but I don't mean it.  Just like I know they don't mean it when they say it to me.  I still miss Kuririn-chan -- I still can't sleep at night, and I still miss him blushing, or that adorable way he would scratch the back of his head when he got embarrassed, or when he'd burst out laughing for no reason.  I miss him holding my hand like it was a great privilege -- not a right, like the other guys, who grab me like I'm property.  I miss a lot of things.  Most of all, I miss that he was the only one who loved me enough to want to get married -- and the only one who loved  enough to let go, instead of me doing the dumping.

I went back to see him, a few months after that big fight was over.  I didn't know what I was going to say, and I didn't know what he was going to say to me, but I wanted to go.  Even if it was just for one day -- or forever.  I wanted to see my Kuririn-chan again, and that was all I really knew.

  


Well, I saw him, all right.  I came by in a boat, like any ordinary tourist would, so he didn't notice me.  I saw him on the beach, playing with a little girl who looked just like him, and I knew right away it was his kid.  I saw him laughing, and the way he laughed, it was nothing like he had been with me.  He wasn't embarrassed, or afraid, or anything like that at all.  I had never seen him so at ease with himself.  He was running around the beach with that cute little girl on his shoulders, yelling something I couldn't hear.

And then . . . I saw her.  For once, I couldn't think of a single mean thing to say about another pretty girl, because, well, she was _pretty_.  I'd even go so far as to say that she's _almost_ as pretty as I am!  And I couldn't call her a Grandma, because I'm positive she's at least ten years younger than I am.  But that didn't really surprise me, because I hadn't _really_ expected Kuririn-chan to wait for me.  Not ten years, that's for sure.  Even after I saw her, though, I thought that maybe there was a chance.  I mean, yeah, the girl was pretty, but I'd known Kuririn-chan first, right?  How long had _she_ known him, huh?

What did surprise me, was when the lady came outside and went over to Kuririn-chan and smiled at him, Kuririn-chan smiled back.  He didn't laugh in that funny, embarrassed way, he didn't turn red, he didn't fumble with his hands or look like he was trying to hide.  Instead, he took her hand in his, pulling her close to him, and kissed her.  Right on the lips.  He never kissed me that way; when I kissed him, he always acted afraid, and he was the one who would pull away first.  This time, it was his wife who stopped, and the look on Kuririn-chan's face when it was over said that he wished she hadn't.

A girl knows when she's beat.  I couldn't compete with something like that . . . that blonde, whoever she was, had done something I couldn't.  She had gotten past Kuririn-chan's wall, and made him forget how to be afraid around women.  So, I told the owner of the boat that I'd gotten the wrong island, and that I'd decided to forget about it and go home.

They saw me, when I was leaving, but they didn't know who I was.  The little girl waved both her arms crazily, and Kuririn-chan did, too.  His wife shook her head and laughed at both of them, but she flicked her fingers at me a little.

That was the last time I ever saw Kuririn-chan, and I know it will be the last time I ever will.  I'm not going to go looking for him anymore.  I'll stay with my millions of boyfriends, and let him have his happy life with his beautiful little girl, and the woman who obviously loves him a lot.

I used to think I was the lucky one, with all the men I meet drooling over me.  I don't think there's ever an evening when I'm not out with a boy, and usually someone different.  I know a whole bunch of women who would do anything to be in my shoes (and they're nice ones, too.  Right now I'm wearing red, high-heeled pumps).  But you know what?  Kuririn-chan's the one who's really fortunate.  For all my boyfriends, I can never once look at them without comparing them to my Kuririn-chan.  That's why my relationships never last more than a day or two, if that.  They can never stack up to the one man who became my measuring tool . . . as weird as that sounds.  Kuririn-chan is luckier than he'll ever know.

Yeah, I know what they think of me.  Maron, the blue-haired ditz who played with Kuririn's heart and then stomped it to pieces, and probably laughed about it afterwards.  But here's something they'll never, ever know -- I did love Kuririn-chan.  I _do_ love Kuririn-chan, if not in the same way as before.  I know it was dumb of me to leave him the way I did, but really, I think it was better for him.  He needed someone patient, and that's not who I am.

But you know, I can't help but wonder . . . if his daughter or wife ever see a photograph of me, what will Kuririn-chan tell them?

******

If I've gotten facts messed up -- real ones, those pertaining to the timeline, not something like "Maron never loved Kuririn!" -- forgive me. I try to be accurate, but *shrugs* the Garlic Jr. saga isn't something I've seen very often. Gimme' credit for trying, right? 


End file.
